On the Sidelines, Once Again
Raiders QB Gardner Minshew was benched Sunday.
That’s not a surprise.
There’s a movie title from the 1970s in there somewhere.
Something akin to:
“Who Is Harry Kellerman and Why Is He Saying Those Terrible Things About Me?”
maybe:
“If it’s October, Gardner Minshew is Getting Benched”
Actually it’s Gardner Minshew II.
Oh, shit. Wait. Why am I burying the lede?
Dude got benched and ate a booger. His own booger. Not a random one.
Anyway.
Listen, I can’t pretend to remember every Gardner Minshew turnover from this season, let alone 2020, when the team he played for then, the Jacksonville Jaguars, went 1-15. My brain now works a lot like a MacBook Air with too many open Chrome tabs. There’s not enough room, and the fucker just stops responding. I’m fascinated that I have friends who can remember a random Pooh Richardson turnover from the Minnesota Timberwolves from 30-odd years ago. But here I am actually having to Google recent things I have a hunch about in order to put a “story” together.
Who has time?
The dude, Minshew, has spent a career on a rollercoaster, since being thrown into action as a rookie in Jacksonville in 2019, when that was not the plan. His entire existence in the NFL was not the plan. Which is maybe why we root for him, perhaps unknowingly, because he bounced around between a community college and two universities before getting drafted in the 5th round.
A persistent son of a bitch. An underdog. He plays like an underdog. He plays cocky, but also like he might lose his car if shit goes sideways. If you watched football and have a stuffed brain, you hang onto only a few details: Minshew Mania, Jorts, vague folk hero vibes, etc. He’s the Best Man at the wedding, wearing stolen bowling shoes. He somehow uses an Ace bandage to quell appendicitis.
He is a spontaneous philosopher.
He bought into his own hype, early.
He captured the imagination of Jacksonville. I don’t know if that’s easy or hard, tbh.
Minshew, a Mississippi dude, came into the league reckless, like a young Brett Favre, or even a latter-day jeans-commercial Brett Favre. And of course, his brief career in Jacksonville was sandwiched by two other inescapable journeymen NFL QB names: Nick Foles and Mike Glennon.
There are also stories of Glennon then being benched for Minshew. And finally his stint in Jacksonville ending:
The Jaguars ended a brief but colorful era on Saturday when they traded quarterback Gardner Minshew to the Philadelphia Eagles for a conditional late-round draft pick.
Minshew was pressed into service as a sixth-round rookie in 2019 when Nick Foles was injured on the 10th offensive play of the season. He went on to lead the Jaguars to a 6-6 record in games he started and was the most productive rookie quarterback in the NFL that season in terms of individual numbers and team victories.
The Brandon, Miss., native was a colorful, exuberant player who endeared himself to Jaguars fans with his smile, swagger, jean shorts, bandanas and reckless style on the field. It didn't sustain itself as he struggled, along with the rest of the team, in last year's 1-15 season. That sealed his fate since the Jaguars were then in a position to draft Trevor Lawrence of Clemson.
There was no way he was ever going to start over Jalen Hurts in Philly.
But he did live in a bus to show his dedication to his conditioning. (That is one I forgot about, for sure.)
After two seasons, Minshew signed with the Colts, and got an unexpected starting gig there when their rookie QB Anthony Richardson went down for the season. Then the “Jockstrap King” signed with the Raiders, who’ve been juggling QBs the past few seasons, hoping (on a semi-regular basis) that Aidan O’Connell and his wispy mustache have the goods, and driving their star receiver Davante Adams nuts.
Since the Raiders landed in Las Vegas in 2020, these guys have lined up behind center at QB:
Derek Carr — (looks like he stole eyeliner from The Killers)
Marcus Mariota
Zay Jones (normally a WR, did this)
Nathan Peterman
Jarrett Stidham
Mack Hollins (WR)
Davante Adams (WR, got sacked)
Aidan O’Connell
Jimmy Garoppolo
Brian Hoyer
Jakobi Meyers (a WR who helped the Raiders before he even played for them)
Josh Jacobs
Gardner Minshew II
On Sunday Minshew airmailed a TD pass that turned into a 100-yard Pick Six, and threw an interception to a white cornerback that made Reddit convulse.
Then he picked a booger and ate it.
Where is this all going? Obviously to another Minshew start in 2 to 4 weeks.
I don’t think the Raiders are gonna get the job done, with whomever plays QB.
But Minshew remains a stranger phenomenon. Even sorta parodied by other QBs.
The other sideline kerfuffle was Cowboys receiver CeeDee Lamb yelling something at Dak Prescott after an interception and it turned into a whole “blue dress” thing where everyone thinks he’s saying something different. (I think it’s “jump ball” but you can go look for yourself.)